Do you ever feel like a plastic bag? Floating through life, hoping someone will recycle you.

Isn't it weird how 'read' and 'read' are pronounced differently? English is a real rebel.

Have you ever noticed how 'fun size' candy bars are never actually that fun? Maybe they should be called 'disappointment size' instead.

Do you ever wonder if clouds look down at us and think 'that one looks like a ham sandwich'?

Why do we say 'bless you' when someone sneezes? Like, what are we blessing them for? The forceful expulsion of germs?

Have you ever noticed how you never actually see a baby pigeon? Do they even exist, or are they just a government conspiracy?

Do you ever feel like a snack-sized bag of chips is just getting less and less satisfying? Maybe they should start making family size bags for single people.

Why do we call it a 'building' when it's already built? Shouldn't it be called a 'built'?

Why do we call them 'apartments' when they're all stuck together? Shouldn't they be called 'togetherments'?

Have you ever noticed how parents always become professional photographers on the first day of school? It's like they're running a full-on photoshoot in the driveway!

Why is it that we can remember lyrics to songs we haven't heard in years, but can't remember why we walked into a room? It's like our brains have a selective memory feature.

I always find it funny how people treat their smartphones like they're delicate babies, yet they toss them around like they're indestructible.

Isn't it interesting how we can meticulously plan out our weekends, only for them to be over in a blink of an eye? Time flies when you're having fun...or napping.

Have you noticed how we always look the most tired on Mondays, yet somehow manage to stay up late binge-watching TV shows on Sundays?

I find it funny how we always say 'I'm never drinking again' after a big night out, only to be back at it the following weekend.

Have you ever noticed how we always say 'just five more minutes' when hitting the snooze button, as if those extra minutes will make a huge difference in our day?

It's funny how we judge how long a minute is based on if we're waiting for something good like pizza versus something boring like a microwave timer.

Why is it that the one time you forget to bring an umbrella, it decides to rain like it's the end of the world?

Have you ever noticed how the good parking spots always seem to be taken by cars that never move? It's like they're taunting us.

I find it funny how we instantly become best friends with someone who likes the same obscure TV show as us. It's like an unspoken bond.

You know you're an adult when your idea of a wild night out is staying up past 10 pm on a weeknight.