Why do we try to hold our breath when walking past smokers, as if that will somehow protect us from the smoke?

I find it amusing how we have hundreds of TV channels, but still struggle to find something to watch most of the time.

Why do we say 'bless you' when someone sneezes, but not when they cough or yawn?

I don't understand why people say 'heads up' when they actually want you to duck.

Why do we call it 'fast food' when we end up waiting forever in the drive-thru?

I find it ironic how we park in driveways and drive on parkways.

I don't understand why people say they can't live without their phones, yet they struggle to find them when they're in their own hands.

Why is it that when someone tells us there are billions of stars in the sky, we believe them, but if they say a wall has wet paint, we have to touch it to be sure?

I find it funny how we always check our pockets for our phone or wallet, even though we just checked them two minutes ago.

You know you're getting old when you get excited about buying new cleaning supplies.

I wish my wallet would lose weight as quickly as my gym membership does.

I find it ironic that the word 'studying' is only one letter away from 'student dying'.

I don't understand why they call it rush hour when nobody is actually moving quickly.

My bed is my favorite investment. I get excited when I think about going to sleep every night.

Does anyone actually know how to fold a fitted sheet, or do we all just pretend?

I always start my diet on a Monday, because there's no point in ruining a weekend.

Isn't it strange how 'fun run' and 'funeral' have one letter that makes all the difference?

Who decided that breakfast food should only be eaten in the morning? I could go for pancakes any time of day.

Once you become a parent, 'sleeping in' becomes a distant memory.

Isn't it odd how we trust a pilot we've never met to hop in a metal tube and fly us across the world?

Isn't it funny how we never actually use our seat belts until we see a police car?