I wonder if the squirrel that keeps raiding my bird feeder is just trying to save some money on groceries.

I never understood why they call it rush hour when everyone is moving so slow.

Can someone invent a mute button for loud chewers in public?

Isn't it ironic how we have more channels to watch and yet still can't decide on what to watch?

Who decided that 'out of order' signs should be posted in public restrooms?

Why do we always say 'I'm almost there' when we know we just left the house?

Do we really need 10 different types of milk at the grocery store?

Why do we always laugh when someone trips even when we know it's not nice?

The only time we care about our neighbors is when we need to borrow something.

Isn't it funny how we never use the top drawer in our kitchen?

Why do we always wave back at someone who isn't actually waving at us?

Why do we always ask 'how are you?' when we don't actually want to know?

Why do we trust the weather forecast when it's wrong half the time?

Why do we pretend to be busy on our phones in public when we're really just scrolling through memes?

Why do we always run up the stairs like there's something chasing us?

Why do we keep buying greeting cards when we know they'll just end up in the trash?

Why do we act surprised when the fast food order is wrong when we know it always is?

Why do we still have buttons on our remote controls when voice commands exist?

Why do we always say 'I'll be there in 5 minutes' when we know it's really 15 minutes?

Why do we call it a 'shortcut' when it's really just taking a different route?

I wonder why people say 'sleep like a baby' when babies wake up every two hours crying.