Why is it that I can remember every lyric to a song from ten years ago, but can't remember why I walked into a room?

I've observed that the more expensive the restaurant, the smaller the portion size. Yet, the bill is always bigger.

I always love how people say 'I'm just going to check my phone for a minute' and then disappear for hours.

Why do we always feel the need to point out the obvious, like 'Wow, it's raining' as if the person next to us can't see it?

It's funny how we have a 'recommended viewing' list on streaming services, as if they know us better than we know ourselves.

Why is it that we never seem to have enough time to do things right, but always enough time to do them over?

Have you ever noticed that the line for the elevator is always longest when you're running late?

I find it amusing how we spend so much time and money trying to look younger, only to spend even more time and money trying to look older when we get older.

Isn't it ironic how we always have the best comebacks in the shower, hours after the argument has ended?

Why do we always say 'just a minute' when we know it's going to take much longer?

I've never seen anyone actually 'catch up' on a TV show by binge-watching it.

Isn't it funny how we justify eating junk food by saying we'll exercise more tomorrow?

I find it amusing how we always manage to find the perfect meme to describe our current mood.

Why is it that the hardest part of going to the gym is actually getting there?

I always wonder why the phrase 'sleep like a baby' is used to describe deep sleep, when babies wake up every few hours.

I can't help but laugh when people talk on the phone in a closet because it's the 'quietest room in the house'.

I'm starting to think that the word 'queue' is just 'Q' followed by four silent letters.

Isn't it funny how the slowest drivers always end up in the fast lane?

Whoever said 'out of sight, out of mind' has clearly never lost their keys.

I always feel like a detective trying to solve a murder mystery when I'm looking for the missing sock.

Why is it that the most expensive clothes are also the ones with the most delicate washing instructions?