I find it amusing how quickly we adapt to sleeping with one arm hanging off the bed, even though it's terrifying in the dark.

Why do we always assume the person waving is waving at us when it could just be for someone behind us?

It's funny how we 'swipe right' in dating apps to find love but 'swipe left' for a lifetime of 'what ifs'.

Do you ever feel like a scientist when you mix random cleaning products in hopes of creating a super powerful solution?

Why do we say we're 'going out for a run' when we never actually leave the same spot on the treadmill?

I'm convinced that couches have a secret agenda to eat all the loose change and TV remotes.

Have you ever noticed that we always look for something in the last place we left it? Well, duh!

It's funny how we trust our phones to autocorrect our words but not our friends to correct our mistakes.

I hate when someone asks me to guess what number they're thinking of... like, am I a psychic now?

It's strange how we brush our teeth before we go to the dentist as if they don't have the power to see the plaque buildup.

Isn't it odd that we tell kids not to play with their food and then proceed to make smiley faces with ketchup on their plates?

I always find it amusing how people make plans 'as if' they have control over time and others' schedules.

Have you ever noticed how we turn down the volume on the radio when we're lost as if that will help us find our way?

It's amazing how we assume people are looking at us when they're most likely thinking about what they want for lunch.

Ever wonder why we announce 'I'm going to bed' like it's a grand departure when we're about to do something so mundane?

Isn't it fascinating that we drive on a parkway and park in a driveway?

I never understand why people say 'Brace yourself' before bad news. Like, what am I supposed to do? Activate my superhero powers?

Why do we say 'rest in peace' as if the dead person has a choice? 'Rest in peace... or else!'

Do you ever notice how dogs always know when you're about to take them to the vet? It's like they have a sixth sense for betrayal.

I don't get why we say 'I slept like a baby' when babies wake up every few hours crying. I want to sleep like an adult, seven hours straight.

Have you ever noticed how people always have their strangest thoughts in the shower? It's like water is a magical portal to weird ideas.