I'm so bad at telling jokes, even crickets refuse to chirp when I try.

I'm so inept at DIY projects, I once accidentally painted my cat instead of the wall.

I'm so bad at video games, I accidentally rage-quit Minesweeper.

I'm so bad at telling stories, my friends use me as a sleep aid.

I'm so clumsy, I tripped over a wireless internet connection.

I'm so unathletic, my Fitbit sends me a sympathy card.

I'm so bad at relationships, my goldfish has a longer commitment history than me.

I'm so bad at fashion, my sense of style is nicknamed 'the fashion disaster'.

I'm so bad at public speaking, I get stage fright even in my own shower.

I'm so bad at math, I count on my fingers to make sure 2+2 equals 4.

I'm so bad at telling stories, I put my friends to sleep faster than a lullaby.

I'm so bad at organization, my desk looks like a tornado hit it... twice.

I'm so bad at driving, even my GPS gets lost when I'm behind the wheel.

I'm so awkward, I've mastered the art of saying 'you too' when it doesn't apply.

I'm so unathletic, I break a sweat just thinking about going to the gym.

I'm so bad at math, my calculator just laughs at me when I try to use it.

I'm so clumsy, I've turned stumbling into an Olympic sport.

I'm so disorganized, I once lost my to-do list... it was written on my hand.

I'm so accident-prone, my middle name should be 'oops'.

I'm so bad at dancing, I look like a flailing octopus on the dance floor.

I'm so clumsy, I once spilled coffee on myself while sitting perfectly still.