What did the politician say to the door-to-door salesman? 'No thanks, I'm already full of empty promises!'

Why did the politician take a nap during the debate? He needed to dream up some new lies!

Why did the politician bring a mirror to the rally? So he could reflect on his bad decisions!

How is a politician like a baby? They both need constant supervision and are always crying for attention!

Why was the politician always calm and collected? He had mastered the art of political Zen!

What's a politician's favorite mode of transportation? The bandwagon - they love jumping on whatever's popular!

Why did the politician join the marching band? To practice his skills in walking back on promises!

Why was the politician always late to meetings? He couldn't decide which tie to wear to impress his constituents!

What do you call a politician who is afraid of heights? A low-flying official!

Why did the politician bring a map to the election? In case he needed to redraw the district lines!

How do politicians communicate in secret? They speak in subcommittee!

Why was the politician good at baseball? He knew how to cover his bases!

What did the politician say to the activist? 'I'll get back to you after the next election!'

What do you call a politician who takes a nap on the job? An official sleeper!

Why did the politician study algebra? To solve for x in every election!

Why did the politician go to the art gallery? To brush up on their campaign posters!

What do you call a politician who's lost an election? A re-count!

Why did the politician carry a pencil at all times? To draw up new policies on the go!

How do politicians handle stress? They vote to take a recess!

What do you get when you cross a politician with a rock star? A lobbyist!

Why did the politician bring a mirror to the debate? To reflect on their answers!