How did the phone propose to the charger? With a ringtone.

What do you call two chickens in love? Poultry in motion.

Why did the computer break up with the printer? It couldn't handle the hard copy.

Why did the toothbrush break up with the toothpaste? It felt like it was getting brushed off.

How did the calculator ask out the math teacher? Can I get your number?

Why did the calendar refuse to go on a date? It felt like it was always too busy.

What did the blanket say to the bed? You make me feel so warm and fuzzy.

How did the washing machine apologize to the dryer? It sent a heartfelt spin cycle.

Why did the mirror break up with the magnifying glass? It couldn't handle the closer examination.

What did the peanut butter say to the jelly? We make a perfect pairing.

How did the sweater propose to the scarf? With a warm embrace.

Why did the doctor break up with the nurse? He had too many patients – and she was ready to take his temperature.

Why did the tomato grow so close to the cucumber? They wanted to be in a healthy relationship.

How did the pillow propose to the blanket? It popped the question one night before bed.

What do you call a bear without a date to the dance? Alone-y.

Why was the calendar so happy? It had too many dates – just like a good relationship.

What did the grape do when it was stepped on? It let out a little wine – just like my girlfriend on a bad day.

Did you hear about the couple who met at the gym? They fell for each other – literally.

How did the math teacher and the history teacher celebrate their anniversary? They divided their time and conquered their love.

What's the difference between a new boyfriend and a new dog? After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

How do construction workers party? They raise the roof – just like a good husband does for his wife.