Why did the comedian break up with the clown? It couldn't take the constant clowning around.

Why did the mountain break up with the valley? It felt like it was being looked down on.

Why did the painter break up with the canvas? They couldn't brush aside their differences.

Why did the architect break up with the engineer? They couldn't build a solid foundation for their relationship.

Why did the computer break up with the internet? They had too many connection issues.

Why did the calendar refuse a second date? It was tired of being stood up.

Why did the bicycle break up with the motorcycle? It couldn't handle the speed.

Why did the cell phone break up with the charger? It was tired of being drained.

Why did the scissors break up with the tape? They were always getting stuck.

Why did the lamp break up with the light bulb? It couldn't handle the brightness.

Why did the pillow break up with the blanket? It couldn't handle the clinginess.

Why did the balloon break up with the needle? It couldn't handle the pop.

Why did the archaeologist break up with his girlfriend? She took him for granite.

What's a skeleton's favorite pick-up line? 'You make me feel alive.'

Why did the baker break up with his girlfriend? She kept loafing around.

What did one magnet say to the other? 'I find you very attractive.'

Why did the scarecrow become a successful comedian? He was outstanding in his field!

Why did the teacher marry the janitor? Because he swept her off her feet.

Why did the man bring a pencil to his date? He wanted to make sure it had a point.

Why did the woman bring a ladder to her date? She heard he liked high standards.

Why did the man propose to the baker? He couldn't resist her sweet buns.