I have a knack for always choosing the most awkward greeting in social situations. Handshake or hug? It's a mystery.

I have a talent for always choosing the slowest line at the supermarket. It's my superpower.

I'm the only person who can trip over nothing and end up apologizing to the floor.

I'm the type of person who gets excited about cancelled plans, even if they were mine.

I'm so bad at dating, even my mirror swipes left on me.

I'm like a human equivalent of a participation award - always there, never really noticed.

I have the dance moves of a scarecrow trying to escape its post.

I'm not great at math, but I can multiply the amount of snacks I eat by 10 in one sitting.

I'm the type of person who trips over the same step twice.

I'm not sure if I'm bad at singing or if my shower just has really good acoustics.

I asked my mirror for help with my self-esteem. It laughed.

I tried to be trendy and buy skinny jeans. Let's just say they weren't the only things feeling constricted.

I went to a party once and tried to dance. It looked more like a fish flopping around on land.

I'm not a bad singer, I just like to keep people on their toes with unexpected notes.

I have a black belt in online shopping and a white belt in martial arts.

I always have the best ideas when it's too late to act on them.

I'm not old, I'm just young at heart... and in my knees.

I once tried to dye my own hair and ended up looking like a neon highlighter.

I'm not short, I'm just more down-to-earth than most people.

I have a love-hate relationship with exercise. I love to hate it.

I tried to do yoga once and ended up in a 'pretzel gone wrong' position for an hour.