Why did the blonde bring a ladder to the library? She heard they had a high-stakes book club.

How did the blonde try to make a candle? She put a flashlight in the freezer and hoped for the best.

Why did the blonde bring a baseball bat to the bar? She heard it was a swing dancing night.

Why did the blonde stare at the cup of coffee? It said 'mugshot' and she was convinced it was her.

How did the blonde try to dry her hair? She put it in the microwave for 2 minutes.

Why did the blonde bring a ladder to the park? She wanted to reach new heights in her picnic game.

Why did the blonde stare at the map for hours? She was looking for the 'X' that marks the spot.

What did the blonde do when she saw 'Made in China' on a puzzle box? She started learning Mandarin.

Why did the blonde stare at the puzzle for hours? She heard it was a piece of cake.

What happened when the blonde saw 'Do Not Disturb' sign? She didn't knock while entering her own house.

Why did the blonde bring a spoon to the restaurant? She heard it was a 'soup kitchen'.

Did you hear about the blonde who got locked in a grocery store? She starved to death in the chip aisle.

Did you hear about the blonde who took a ruler to bed? She wanted to measure how long she slept.

What did the blonde do when she saw the 'Wet Floor' sign? She found a dry spot.

Why did the blonde bring a pencil to the doctor's office? She heard it was a 'write-in' clinic.

How does a blonde turn on the light after having sex? She opens the car door.

What did the blonde do when she heard it was going to be chilly outside? She brought a bowl.

How did the blonde drown while drinking water? She couldn't find the straw.

Why did the blonde bring a towel to the comedy show? She heard they were doing dry humor.

Why did the blonde bring a pencil to the bar? She heard the cocktails were sketchy!

Why did the blonde try to steal a police car? She thought it was a cop-out!