Why did the politician become a tailor? He was great at altering the truth!

Why did the politician bring a deck of cards to the rally? He wanted to play the victim card!

What's a politician's favorite type of seafood? Lobbi-sters!

Why did the politician become a locksmith? He was an expert at changing positions!

Why did the politician choose a career in politics? He heard it was a great way to make enemies!

What do you call a group of politicians on a hunting trip? A quack!

What do you get when you cross a politician with a computer? A spin doctor!

Why did the politician refuse to play chess? He was tired of being outmaneuvered!

Why did the politician go to the doctor? To get some advice on backpedaling!

Why don't politicians watch TV? They prefer to control the narrative!

Why was the politician always running late? He had to make sure all his scandals were lined up!

Why did the politician join the circus? He heard they needed someone who could juggle the budget!

Why did the politician carry a pencil to the election? In case he needed to erase some promises!

What do you call a group of politicians in a hot tub? A Jacuzzi of liars!

Why did the politician sit on the clock during the speech? Because he wanted to filibuster!

What do you call a politician who loses an election? A re-tired candidate!

Why did the politician carry a pencil to the rally? In case he needed to erase his promises!

What's a politician's favorite type of pizza? Supreme leader-ship!

Why did the politician bring a mirror to the campaign event? To reflect on his choices!

How do politicians handle stress? They filibuster their feelings!

What did the politician say to the dessert table? 'I'm here to make a sweet deal!'