Why did the politician go to the bank? To withdraw support for their opponent.

What do you call a politician who can't keep a secret? A leaky caucuser.

Why did the politician join a band? To play the spin doctor role.

How do politicians handle rejection? They blame it on the Electoral College.

Why did the politician bring a mirror to the debate? To reflect on their dodgy answers.

What's a politician's favorite accessory? Red tape, of course.

How does a politician fish? By casting lies and reeling in votes.

Why did the politician go to the art gallery? To improve his 'politicianal' views.

Why did the politician join a band? He heard they had great 'political' harmony.

What do you call a politician who's good with numbers? An Excel-lent candidate.

Why do politicians make terrible comedians? They always go off script.

Why was the politician upset with the movie theater? There were too many independents.

How do politicians communicate in secret? They use a Parliament-ary language.

Why did the politician go to the gym? To work on his 'running' for office.

Why do politicians make terrible detectives? They always cover up the evidence.

Why was the politician so confident during the debate? He had a trump card.

How do politicians take their coffee? With a tea-spoon.

What do you call a politician who's lost an election? A deputy defeated.

Why did the politician bring a pencil to the campaign? To draw support.

What's the fastest way to determine a politician is lying? Their lips are moving.

Why was the election so close? Because the candidates were tied!