Why did the politician become a gardener? To plant seeds of doubt!

How do politicians cool off in the summer? They pass the buck-et!

What do you call a politician with good handwriting? A smooth operator!

Why did the politician go to the circus? To learn how to juggle the budget!

How do politicians take their coffee? With a lot of steam and cream!

Why did the politician join the circus? To learn how to spin the truth like a top!

What do you call a politician with a green thumb? A lobbyist!

Why did the politician go to the concert? To hit the right notes with the voters!

What do you get when you cross a politician and a lawyer? Someone who makes promises they can't keep and then finds a loophole to get out of them!

How does a politician say hello? 'Vote for me!'

Why did the politician go to the farmer's market? To get some fresh votes!

How does a politician make a decision? They flip-flop until they find the popular position!

What's a politician's favorite season? Election season - it's when they get the most attention!

What's a politician's favorite type of dessert? Pie - they love cutting it into smaller pieces!

How do politicians serve their drinks? With a lot of spin!

What do you get when you mix a politician and a comedian? A very funny, but untrustworthy, individual!

Why did the politician go to the circus? To see all the acrobatics of flip-flopping!

Why was the math book upset with the politician? Because he always tried to divide and conquer!

How do politicians greet each other? By shaking hands and kissing babies!

What do you call a politician who is afraid of commitment? A flip-flop conservative!

Why did the politician go to the supermarket? To see if he could lower the prices with his charm!