What do you call a politician who is also a musician? A lobbyist!

Why did the politician bring a map to the debate? To stay on track!

Why did the politician go to the art museum? To brush up on their painting skills for those political portraits!

What's the difference between a cat and a politician? One meows for treats, the other shows receipts!

Why do politicians always carry a tape measure? To make sure their promises measure up!

How do politicians stay in shape? They run for office!

Why did the politician go to the doctor? To get a new prescription for votes!

Why did the politician write a memoir? To add some fiction to their nonfiction career!

What do you call a politician with a dog? A bark-ratician!

Why don't politicians play chess? They can't decide which way is left or right!

Why did the politician bring a pencil to the election? To draw up some new laws!

Why did the government hire a gardener? To help with all the political landscaping!

Why did the politician go to the baseball game? To learn how to pitch their ideas!

Why did the politician go to the beach? To test the waters!

What's a politician's favorite type of humor? Spin comedy!

Why did the politician go to the grocery store? To stock up on talking points!

Why did the politician bring a map to the debate? So they wouldn't get lost in their own talking points!

What do you call a group of politicians stuck in a canoe? A sinking cabinet!

Why did the politician go to the bank? To check their balance of power!

Why did the politician always carry a map? To navigate around the tough questions!

What's a politician's favorite type of paper? False promissory notes!