Why was the politician good at match-making? He knew how to make political connections!

Why did the politician carry a backpack? To store all his backdoor deals!

Why did the politician become a gardener? He wanted to rake in the votes!

What do politicians do when they retire? They run for re-tirement!

Why was the politician always calm? He had free political will!

Why did the politician switch to a paperless office? To avoid the paper trail!

Why did the politician take up painting? He wanted to whitewash his past!

What do you call a politician who loses his voice? Speechless!

Why don't politicians like camping? They can't handle the intense scrutiny in-tents!

Why did the politician bring a calculator to the debate? To count on some numbers!

Why did the politician join the orchestra? To conduct himself with grace!

Why don't politicians eat fast food? They prefer to filibuster!

Why did the politician become a tailor? To sew up the loopholes!

Why did the politician go to the zoo? To learn how to handle elephants in the room!

Why was the politician always the first one to leave a party? He wanted to beat the traffic laws!

Why did the politician go to the library? To find out if knowledge really is power!

Why did the politician become a painter? He wanted to cover up his mistakes with a fresh coat of paint!

What do you get when you cross a politician with a circus clown? A lot of red noses and big shoes in the government!

Why did the politician break up with his calculator? It was always dividing the bill unevenly!

Why did the politician join the orchestra? He wanted to be in the swing of things!

Why did the politician go to the baseball game? He heard they were serving up some good pitches!