How do politicians enjoy their tea? They like it steeped in controversy!

Why did the politician bring a mirror to the interview? To practice their reflection on the issues!

Why did the politician always carry a mirror? So they could see their reflection of power!

What did the politician say to the skeptical voter? 'Trust me, I promise!'

Why did the politician go to the tailor? To get their campaign suit tailored for success!

Why did the politician refuse to play poker? They didn't want to show their hand too early!

Why did the politician become an artist? They wanted to paint a positive picture of their policies!

What's a politician's favorite dessert? A turnover, because they're used to changing positions!

Why did the politician bring a calculator to the debate? To sum up all their promises!

How do politicians communicate with each other? Through filibustered emails!

Why did the politician sit on the clock during the debate? Because they wanted to be on the watch!

How do politicians make decisions? They spin the issue until it suits them!

Why did the politician carry a mirror to the rally? So they could see their reflection in the polls!

Why did the politician take up gardening? Because they heard it was a great way to plant seeds of change!

What do you call a politician who's always cold? A chilly-con!

How do politicians get their exercise? By running around the issues!

What do you call a politician who's lost an election? A night light, because they're all out!

Why did the politician break up with his calendar? Because the relationship wasn't going anywhere!

Why was the politician always calm? They had a lot of experience dealing with cover-ups!

Why did the politician become a gardener? They heard it was a great way to rake in the votes!

How do politicians communicate underwater? They drop the polls!