What did the tie say to the shirt? 'I'm knot letting you go.'

Why did the scarecrow break up with his girlfriend? She was too straw-ng for him.

Why did the cheese break up with the cracker? It was too hard for their relationship to stay together.

I told my boyfriend we should go to couples therapy. He said, 'What's that, a new restaurant?'

Why did the romantic novel break up with the mystery novel? The mystery novel just couldn't reveal enough about itself.

I accidentally called my boyfriend 'Google' because he knows everything. He replied, 'Well, at least I'm not Bing.'

Why did the phone break up with the charger? It just couldn't handle the attachment issues.

Why did the music teacher date the biology teacher? They found the perfect harmony in their relationship.

I told my husband I wanted to spice things up in our marriage. He handed me a chili pepper and said, 'Be careful what you wish for.'

Why did the romantic comedy film break up with the action movie? It just didn't feel the spark anymore.

When is it okay to date a ghost? When you don't mind a little boo in your relationship.

Why did the grape stop dating the raisin? Things just got too dried out between them.

My girlfriend told me she needed some space. I replied, 'That's okay, there's plenty of it in the universe.'

Why did the dog bring a pencil to its date? In case they needed a 'paws' for thought.

Why did the skeleton break up with his girlfriend? She didn't have the guts he was looking for.

Why did the relationship between the math book and the history book work out? They both knew how to solve problems together.

What did the calculator say to the math textbook? 'You can count on me!'

Why did the couple go to the therapist? They wanted help with their attachments issues.

Why did the baker break up with their oven? They were tired of all the heat in the relationship.

I bought my wife a fridge for her birthday. It's not the best gift, but the rest will be cool.

My girlfriend told me she needs space. So I locked her outside.