I'm so bad at budgeting, I once bought a dollar store calculator.

I'm so clumsy, I manage to spill my drink even when using a sippy cup.

I'm such a bad dancer, I've been asked if I was doing the robot... when I wasn't even trying.

I'm so forgetful, I once left my keys in the fridge.

I'm so bad at public speaking, my idea of a joke is apologizing for being there.

I'm so disorganized, I have a junk drawer for my junk drawer.

I'm so accident-prone, I have a frequent flyer card for the ER.

I'm so lazy, I break a sweat just thinking about exercise.

I'm so bad at fashion, I still wear my high school prom dress.

I'm such a bad dancer, I could be mistaken for a scarecrow.

I'm so bad at karaoke, I've been asked to mime instead.

I'm so clumsy, if there's a puddle, I will find it.

I'm so forgetful, I always remember things... a day late.

I'm so bad at singing, even the neighbors ask me to stop.

I'm so bad at technology, I still have a VCR player.

I'm so awkward, my shadow avoids me.

I'm terrible at making decisions, I can't even choose a favorite color.

I'm such a procrastinator, I made a New Year's resolution for next year.

I'm so uncoordinated, I once tripped over a wireless internet connection.

I'm terrible at remembering names, I just call everyone 'buddy'.

I tried to write a book, but I couldn't get past the dedication page.