I'm so unathletic, I once got a cramp from stretching.

I'm so bad at jokes, I once told a pun and nobody laughed.

I'm so awkward, I accidentally hugged a stranger thinking they were a friend.

I'm so unathletic, I once got a cramp from watching a sports game.

I'm so bad at dancing, I once tried to twerk and pulled a muscle.

I'm so bad at sports, I once got hit in the face with a dodgeball.

I'm so bad at cooking, I set off the smoke detector boiling water.

I'm so bad at shopping, I once tried on a shirt backwards and didn't notice until I got home.

I'm so bad at sleeping, I've mistaken 5 AM for bedtime.

I'm so bad at accents, I once tried to do a British accent and ended up sounding Australian.

I'm so bad at planning, I once booked a vacation to the wrong city.

I'm so bad at making excuses, I once blamed my cat for eating my homework...and I don't even have a cat.

I'm so forgetful, I often lose arguments with myself.

I'm so accident-prone, I once broke my toe kicking a door that was already open.

I'm so bad at singing, I could shatter glass with my voice...if the glass was strong enough.

I'm so bad at taking selfies, I break the camera's lens every time I try.

I'm so forgetful, I once panicked because I couldn't find my phone... while talking on it.

I'm so lazy that I set my phone's password to 0000 so I don't have to lift a finger.

I've been single for so long, my plants in Animal Crossing keep dying.

I'm so bad at keeping secrets, even my password hints give me away.

I'm so forgetful, I once tried to brush my teeth with a fork.