Why did the scarecrow refuse to play dodgeball? It didn't want to be out-standing in the field!

Why did the astronaut break up with the mirror? It didn't reflect well on him!

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of timepiece!

Why did the scarecrow win a marathon? Because it had outstanding straw-gility!

Why did the feline visit the barbershop? It needed a cat cut!

How do you catch a squirrel on a trapeze? Just squirrel it away with nuts!

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear with a sticky situation!

Why did the scarecrow become a detective? Because he was outstanding at straw-ing out clues!

Why did the scarecrow win an award in acrobatics? Because he was outstanding at straw-balancing!

Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had stage fright!

Why did the scarecrow win an award for his acting skills? He was outstanding in his field!

Why did the scarecrow go to school? To brush up on his straw-dies!

Why did the lemons go to counseling? They were having too many sour relationships!

Why did the scarecrow bring a tape measure? He wanted to see how corny he was!

Why did the scarecrow become a great comedian? He was outstanding in his field!

Why did the baker go to therapy? Because he kneaded it!

What kind of bird sticks to sweaters? Vel-crows!

What's the fastest liquid on Earth? Milk - it's pasteurized before you even see it!

Why did the scarecrow win an Olympic medal? Because he was outstanding in his field!

Why was the skeleton feeling sad? He didn't have the guts to be happy!

What did the math book say to the history book? Boy, do I have problems!