How does a train eat? It choo-choos its food!

Why did the pirate go to the store? To buy an arrrrrgyle sweater!

Why did the pencil go to the party alone? It didn't have a point!

What did one mirror say to the other mirror? It's nice to reflect on things!

Why did the scarecrow become a successful stand-up comedian? He had all the best jokes in the field!

Why did the teacher wear sunglasses to the math class? Because she had too many problems to solve!

Why did the computer go to the doctor? Because it had a virus that needed to be removed!

Why did the golf ball bring two pairs of pants? In case it got a hole-in-one!

Why did the trumpet player get kicked out of the band? Because he always blew his own horn!

Why did the duck say to the bartender? Put it on my bill because I'm paying!

What do you call a fish wearing a crown? A king fish who rules the underwater kingdom!

What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain of feline friends!

What's green and sings? Elvis Parsley, the vegetable crooner!

Why did the musician get kicked out of the band? He couldn't keep in tune!

Why was the baseball team so good at baking? They kneaded the dough!

Why did the math teacher break up with the calculator? It just wasn't adding up!

Why did the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired to sit down!

Why did the mathematician turn to physical comedy? He couldn't solve for funny using algebra!

Why did the tomato refuse to play hide and seek? It knew it would be easily found!

What do you call a belt made out of paper? A waist of paper!

Why did the bike fall over? It was two tired from all the riding!