What did the germ say when it won the lottery? It was germ-tastic!

Why did the sponge break up with the soap? It said it needed some personal space!

How do you get a whale to smile? You tickle its blowhole!

Why did the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted!

How do you make a tree fall down? You turn it into a log!

Why did the bacteria join the brass band? It had the tuba tooties!

Why are teddy bears never hungry? They’re always stuffed!

Why was the pepper so nosy? It wanted to know jalapeño business!

What’s a cow’s favorite lunch meat? Bullogna!

Why did the toilet paper roll uphill? To unwind!

Why did the pothole go to the dance? It heard they needed some smooth moves!

Why did the cheese go to the museum? Because it had a grate time!

Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he's a fun-guy!

Why did the bubble gum cross the road? Because it was stuck to the chicken's foot!

What happens to nitrogen when the sun comes up? It becomes daytrogen!

Why can't bicycles stand up by themselves? They're two-tired!

What do you call a group of unorganized cats? A catastrophe!

Why was the nose always in the news? It was always picking up something!

Why did the toilet paper roll backwards? It got stuck in a sticky situation!

What do you get when you cross a toilet and a computer? A crappy interface!

Why did the nose refuse to blow? It didn't want to pick sides!