What did the blonde say when she found out she was hired as a receptionist? 'I hope it's for the phone.'

Why did the blonde take a roller coaster to work? She heard it was a fast track to success.

What did the blonde say when she saw a 'No Smoking' sign? 'I guess I can't light up my candles.'

Why did the blonde bring a spoon to the dinner party? She heard it was a potluck.

How did the blonde try to cool down the room? By turning on the fan with nothing in front of it.

Why did the blonde bring a TV to the bar? She heard they were screening cocktails.

How did the blonde try to kill a fish? By drowning it in water.

How did the blonde break her leg playing tennis? She tried to serve the ball.

Why did the blonde bring a pencil to the party? She heard they were drawing attention.

Why did the blonde bring a thermometer to the bar? She heard they were serving chilled drinks.

How did the blonde try to kill a bird? By throwing breadcrumbs at it and waiting for it to eat itself to death.

What did the blonde say when she heard it was snowing? 'I better grab a spoon and start shoveling.'

How did the blonde try to kill a plant? By overwatering it and drowning it.

Why did the blonde wear sunglasses to the bar? She heard they had bright ideas on tap.

What did the blonde say when she saw a sign that said 'Do not disturb'? 'I better go in and find out what's happening.'

Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice for hours? She thought it said 'study'.

What did the blonde do when she saw a 'Wet Floor' sign? She took a shower.

What did the blonde do when she couldn't find the remote? She watched the fish tank.

Why did the blonde wear a turtle neck sweater? To hide her flea collar.

Why did the blonde get a new car? She wanted a clean slate.

How did the blonde try to get rid of a mouse? By setting up a Ferris wheel.