Why did the blonde sit on the roof of the bar? She heard the drinks were on the house.

Why did the blonde take her typewriter to the doctor? She thought it was pregnant because it missed a period.

Why did the blonde rent her mailbox? She heard there was a lot of junk mail.

What does a blonde owl say? What, what?

Why don't blondes breastfeed their babies? It hurts too much when they boil their nipples.

How do you get a blonde's eyes to twinkle? Shine a torch in her ear.

Why did the blonde bake a chicken for three and a half days? The instructions said 'cook it for half an hour per pound'

Did you hear about the blonde that got fired from the M&M factory? She kept throwing away all the Ws.

What do you call a blonde with dye? Artificial intelligence.

What do you call a brunette between two blondes? An interpreter.

What did the blonde do when she saw a 'No Smoking' sign? She asked if vaping was allowed instead.

Why did the blonde bring a stethoscope to the bar? She wanted to check if the beat of the music was in tune.

Why did the blonde bring a backpack to the bar? She wanted to pack up all the fun and take it home.

What did the blonde say when she saw a 'No Turn on Red' sign? She turned left instead.

Why did the blonde bring a telescope to the bar? She wanted to see if the drinks were out of this world.

What did the blonde do when she saw a 'No Littering' sign? She picked up all the trash and turned it into a fashion statement.

Why did the blonde bring a vacuum sealer to the bar? She wanted to preserve the memories of her night out.

Why did the blonde bring a compass to the bar? She wanted to make sure she was heading in the right direction for a good time.

What did the blonde do when she saw a 'No Loitering' sign? She stayed and loitered until closing time.

Why did the blonde bring a dictionary to the bar? She wanted to look up the definition of 'happy hour'.

What did the blonde say when she saw a 'No Photography' sign? She asked if selfies were allowed.