Why did the blonde bring a chainsaw to the bar? They heard it was a tree-mendous party.

How did the blonde try to kill a bird? They threw it a farewell party.

Why did the blonde bring a pen to the bar? They heard it was 'write' night.

How did the blonde try to kill a fish? They took it out for sushi.

How did the blonde try to kill a bird? They sent it on a one-way trip.

Why did the blonde take a ladder to the bar? They wanted to bring their own 'steps'.

What did the blonde say when asked to make a U-turn? 'What's a U-turn?'

How did the blonde try to kill a fish? They put it in a dry aquarium.

What do you call a blonde with a chainsaw? Deadliest Waxer.

How did the blonde fall down the stairs? They missed the step ladder.

What did the blonde say when asked what 2+2 is? 'Fish'.

What do you call a blonde with a PhD? A scientist in disguise.

What did the blonde say when given a box of Cheerios? 'Oh, donut seeds!'

Why couldn’t the blonde write the number 11? They couldn't find the 10.

Why did the blonde return a puzzle? They thought it was broken because the picture on the box didn't match the pieces.

Why did the blonde become a sailor? They heard the best way to catch a wave was to drop one.

What do you call a blonde surrounded by 1,000 people? Left alone.

Why did the blonde buy a white car? Because they heard it was 'automatic'.

Why did the blonde get locked in the grocery store? She mistook the Milky Way for the checkout aisle.

What did the blonde do when she found out she was pregnant? She looked for the owner.

Why did the blonde go to the airport with a suitcase instead of a carry-on? She heard it was a 'baggage' claim.