Why did the blonde bring a radio to the bar? She wanted to tune into the happy hour specials.

What did the blonde say when she found out her calculator was broken? 'I think it's un-addable.'

Why did the blonde go to the pet store? She heard they were giving out free puppies with every purchase.

Why did the blonde bring a bucket to the bar? She heard the drinks were bottomless.

Why did the blonde go to the dentist? She heard they offer floss with every smile.

Why did the blonde go to the library? She heard they have a book on how to read.

What did the blonde do when she heard it was snowing? She grabbed a fork and started eating.

What did the blonde do when she saw a 'no pets allowed' sign? She walked in on all fours and said she was a service animal.

Why did the blonde wear a baseball cap to the fancy dinner party? She heard it was a 'hat' cuisine restaurant.

How did the blonde try to fix her flat tire? She filled it with helium and called it a spare.

Why did the blonde bring a GPS to the bar? So she wouldn't get lost in her drink.

Why did the blonde bring a knife to the bar? To cut a rug on the dance floor.

How did the blonde die while eating a chocolate bar? She choked on the nutritional information.

Why did the blonde take a ladder to the gym? She heard it was a step class.

What did the blonde do when she found a wallet full of money? She returned it, because she thought someone had lost their shopping list.

Why did the blonde bring a candle to the bar? So she could 'light up the room.'

How did the blonde try to cool down her laptop? She opened Windows.

Why did the blonde bring a mirror to the bar? She heard it was 'happy hour'.

What did the blonde do when the waiter said 'check please'? She did a double take.

Why did the blonde bring a fan to the beach? She heard it was a cool place to hang out.

How did the blonde try to make breakfast? By using the smoke alarm as a timer.