Why did the blonde carry a weight on her head? She heard it was good exercise for the 'mind'.

Why did the blonde bring a chainsaw to the art class? She heard they were doing 'abstract' paintings.

How did the blonde try to do a puzzle? She tried to fit square pegs in round holes.

Why did the blonde wear headphones at the bar? She heard they had a live band but wanted to listen to her own music.

Why did the blonde buy a coffee table? She needed a place to write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece of paper.

How did the blonde die reading a book? She drowned trying to turn the page.

How did the blonde break her leg playing hockey? She got stuck in the Zamboni.

What did the blonde do when she saw the highway sign that said 'Keep Right'? She turned around and went home.

Why did the blonde bring a key to the bar? She heard they had great cocktails and wanted to unlock the flavor.

How did the blonde break her arm at the gym? She tripped over a wireless treadmill.

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint 'WET PAINT' on a door and tell them not to touch it.

Why did the blonde only make 7 ice cubes? She heard you should only make 8.

Why did the blonde purchase a video camera with a monitor? She heard the movie was in black and white.

Why did the blonde stop using the elevator? She started seeing things from a different level.

Why did the blonde get locked out of the car? She left the key in the ignition.

Why did the blonde start a YouTube channel? To upload tutorials on how to open a door.

Why did the blonde bring a flashlight to the fashion show? She wanted to shine a light on the designer.

Why did the blonde bring a boomerang to the carnival? She heard it was a throwback to fun.

Why did the blonde bring a price tag to the bar? To show she was worth it.

Why did the blonde bring a shoebox to the zoo? She wanted to see if the animals had a sole.

Why did the blonde bring a stapler to the cooking class? She wanted to keep her recipe together.