Why did the vampire open a blood bank? To make withdrawals in cases of emergency.

What do you call a witch at the beach? A sandwich.

Why did the werewolf get a job at the pet store? To have a job where he could really let his hair down.

Why did the monster start a band? It had a real scream of a voice.

Why did the zombie go to the comedy show? To laugh until it fell apart.

What do you call a haunted chicken coop? A poultry-geist.

Why did the skeleton break up with his girlfriend? She didn't understand his bone structure.

Why did the vampire refuse to bite Taylor Swift? He heard she had bad blood.

Why did the mummy take up gardening? To make sure everything was wrapped up in silk.

How do ghosts stay in shape? By exorcising regularly.

Why did the zombie start gardening? To grow a graveyard of his own.

Why did the scarecrow refuse to get promoted? It wanted to remain outstanding in its field.

What's a vampire's favorite food? Spook-ghetti.

What's a zombie's favorite joke? It's a deadpan delivery every time.

Why don't vampires play baseball? They lost their bats in a coffin somewhere.

What do you call a murderous bed? A killow.

Why did the monster eat a lightbulb? Because he wanted a light snack.

What's the difference between a vampire and a snowman? One melts in the sun, the other just sparkles.

How did the zombie become a successful entrepreneur? He was really good at dead-ication.

What's the worst job at the haunted house? A human scarecrow.

Why did the coffin have a hole in it? Someone made a grave mistake.