Why did the Frenchman bring a mirror to the wine tasting? So he could see the Bordeaux!

How does a Jamaican answer the phone? Rasta hello!

Why did the Irishman bring a hammer to the bar? He heard the Guinness was on tap!

Why do Australians always carry a knife? In case they run into a kangaroo steak!

Why did the Russian buy an iPhone? He heard it came with Putin technology!

Why did the Canadian go to the doctor? He had syrup-ritis!

Why was the sushi chef always calm? He practiced good rice control!

What do you call a group of organized cats? A meow-t!

Why was the musician always calm? He had good rhythm!

Why do Chinese people make the best detectives? They always wok the case!

Why did the basketball player go to the bank? To get his quarter back!

Why do vampires seem sick all the time? Because they're always coffin!

How do Chinese people name their children? They throw pots and pans down the stairs and see what noise they make!

What do you call an Indian who has been denied a credit card? Aibi Dena!

Why did the Scottish person wear a kilt? Because a sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away!

What do you call a group of Canadians stuck in traffic? A caribou!

How do you know when a Polish person is lying? When he is speaking.

How does a French cat say 'meow'? Le meow!

Why did the Greek man break up with his tailor? Because he couldn't handle the sew-sew relationship!

Why couldn't the Spanish teacher control her class? They were too Chilean!

Why did the German car have such low self-esteem? Because it had too many Audi issues!