Why did the politician become a tailor? He knew how to weave a good story.

What's a politician's favorite sport? Spin cycling.

Why did the politician go to the library? He needed to check out some foreign policies.

What do you call a politician who loves to travel? A jet-setter senator.

Why did the politician invest in real estate? He wanted to build a strong political foundation.

What do you call a politician who loves to dance? A ballot boogie enthusiast.

Why did the politician start a garden? He wanted to plant seeds of change.

Why don't politicians ever play poker? They can't handle a 'full house' of competition.

Why did the politician become a lifeguard? He wanted to be in charge of 'wave'-making decisions.

What do you call a politician who loves to sing? A ballad-belting bureaucrat.

Did you hear about the politician who went to the store? He was looking for a 'vote' of confidence.

What's a politician's favorite type of workout? Spin class.

Why did the politician wear sunglasses to the speech? To block out the haters.

What do you call a politician who only tells the truth? Unemployed.

Why did the politician bring a teddy bear to the debate? To soften his image.

What's a politician's favorite way to cook eggs? Scrambled - just like their policies.

What do you call a politician who can't swim? Drowning in debt.

Why did the politician become a stand-up comedian? To distract people from their broken promises.

Why did the politician carry a photo album to the election? To show proof of his flip-flopping positions.

What do you call a politician who is afraid of commitment? A flip-flopper.

What do you call a politician with a speech impediment? A filibusterer.