What do you call a meeting between politicians? A compromise, where everyone gets a little bit of what they want and a lot of what they don't.

Why did the politician bring a shovel to the debate? To dig himself out of tough questions.

What do you get when you cross a politician with a rock band? A lot of feedback but no real solutions.

How do you get a politician to change a lightbulb? Tell them it's for renewable energy.

Why did the politician refuse to play chess? Too many non-moves in the game for their taste.

What's the difference between a politician and a computer? You only have to punch information into the computer once.

Why did the politician go to the doctor? Because they had a cabinet reshuffle!

Why did the politician go to the dentist? To fix all his flip-flopping!

Why did the politician go to the bank? To get his campaign.

Why did the politician bring a ladder to the election? Because he heard the polls were high!

Why did the politician go to the chiropractor? To get his backbone adjusted.

Why did the politician go to the doctor? Because they had a chronic inability to listen to the heartbeat of the people.

Why did the politician go to the doctor? Because he had a severe lack of common sense!

Why did the politician go to the bank? To get their campaign finances in order!

Why did the politician go to the dentist? To fix his crooked smile.

Why did the politician go to the doctor? Because he couldn't stop passing bills!

Did you hear about the politician who lost his left side? He's all right now.

How many politicians does it take to change a light bulb? None, they're too busy screwing the public.

Why did the politician go to the art show? To see the 'politically correct' paintings.

What do you call a politician who's lost his mind? A cabinet minister.

Have you heard about the new restaurant called Karma? There's no menu - you get what you deserve.