Why did the politician become a baker? He loved kneading the dough, just like he did with the laws.

Why did the politician become a chef? He was good at cooking up excuses.

Why did the politician become an astronaut? To escape the earth's problems.

Why did the politician join the swim team? He wanted to dive into corruption headfirst.

Why did the politician join the circus? He was a natural clown.

Why did the politician bring a map to the election? So they could navigate around the tough questions.

What do politicians use to cook with? Spinach.

What do you call a politician who is also an artist? A con artist.

Why did the politician go to acting school? To improve their ability to fake sincerity.

Why was the politician able to predict the future? He had a great track record of flipping positions.

Why did the politician bring a stopwatch to the debate? To make sure he had the last word.

Why did the politician go to the baseball game? He wanted to learn how to pitch promises.

Why did the politician join a band? He wanted to experience being in a coalition.

Why did the politician take a cooking class? He wanted to learn how to cook the books.

Why did the politician bring a map to the office? To navigate the political landscape.

Why did the politician become a lawyer? He wanted to legislate his way out of trouble.

How does a politician show his love? By gerrymandering.

Why did the politician start a bakery? He wanted to bring more turnover to the government.

Why did the politician break up with his calendar? Because he wanted to be independent of dates.

Why did the politician go to school? To learn how to filibust a move.

Why did the politician go to therapy? To address their deep-seated issues.