I used to be a banker, but I couldn't account for my actions.

I told my computer a joke, but it had no download.

I used to be a tailor, but I couldn't sew it coming.

I told a joke about a clock, but it was too time consuming.

I used to be a baker, but my pastries didn't rise to the occasion.

I used to be a candle maker, but things went downhill.

I used to be a watchmaker, but it was too time-consuming.

Why did the vegan go crazy? He lost his beans.

I'm friends with all the oceans, we have a great current relationship.

I'm friends with the sun, we have a bright friendship.

I told a construction joke, but it fell flat.

I screamed 'I'm a muffin!' at my psychiatrist, now I'm in a mental crumb.

I'm friends with the moon, it's so down to earth.

I'm friends with a lot of cows, they're so amoosing.

I'm friends with a big hill, it's so steep.

I used to work at a mirror factory, but it was a job I could see myself doing.

I tried to write a joke about birds, but it flew over my head.

I'm friends with a suitcase, we have a lot of baggage.

I used to be a gardener, but I couldn't dig the roots.

I'm friends with a window, we have a clear view together.

I tried to write a joke about the circus, but it was too intense.