How did the artist confess his love? He drew a picture-perfect heart.

How did the comedian break up with his partner? He said, 'Let's split the laughs'.

What did the window say to the door? 'You're always a-'jar'-ing'.

Why did the lobster go on a date with the crab? They wanted to 'sea' if they had chemistry.

How did the plant propose to its partner? With a 'rose' and a heartfelt note.

Why did the painter date the canvas? They were a perfect match in 'hue'mor.

What did the tie say to the shirt? 'It's a match made in wardrobe'.

Why did the electricity break up with the lightning bolt? There were too many 'shocking' moments.

What did the grape say to his date? 'You're a grape catch!'

How did the salad ask out the celery? With a little 'lettuce be together'.

Why did the music note break up with the guitar? It found a new 'beat'.

Why did the baker go on a date with the donut? He found it 'hole'-some.

How do you know if your date likes math? They always want to multiply the fun.

Why did the computer date the printer? Because it had a good 'connection'.

Why don't scientists trust genetics when it comes to relationships? They say it's just a 'punnet square'.

Why did the mermaid break up with the clam? They were just not on the same wavelength.

What do you call a bear without a date? A 'bear' naked bear.

Why do programmers prefer relationships to be fully committed? Because they don't like to see others accessing their resources.

My girlfriend said I never listen to her. At least I think that's what she said.

I asked my girlfriend to rate my listening skills from 1 to 10. She said 8.5. I thought she said 8 at first, but she told me her score was 8.5.

My husband and I are taking salsa lessons. He's great at the dip, but not so much at the salsa.