My boyfriend said he needed some space. I said, 'Join NASA then!'

Why do skeletons never go on a date? They don't have the guts.

My husband told me I should do lunges to stay in shape, but that would be a big step forward.

Why did the romantic comedian break up with their partner? They just couldn't find the right punchline.

Why do ghosts make terrible dates? They'll just ghost you.

My wife said she wanted to watch a movie under the stars. That's why we have a hole in our roof.

Why did the man propose to his toaster? He wanted a lifelong commitment.

My girlfriend said she wanted me to be more affectionate. So now I call her WiFi, because we have a connection.

Why do couples never go to the gym? Because some relationships don't work out.

Why do programmers prefer dogs over dates? Dogs understand when you need to fetch something.

Why did the umbrella break up with the raincoat? It needed some space to open up.

Why did the math problem break up with the calculator? It just couldn't solve things together.

Why did the chef break up with the oven? He couldn't handle the heat.

Why did the mailbox break up with the post office? It wanted to branch out on its own.

Why did the farmer break up with the scarecrow? He was tired of straw arguments.

Why did the tree break up with the hammock? It was tired of being strung along.

Why did the clock break up with the watch? It felt like time was ticking on.

Why did the cat break up with the mouse pad? It was tired of clickbait.

Why did the athlete break up with the treadmill? He needed to run free.

Why did the painter break up with the canvas? He needed a blank slate.

Why did the teacher break up with the pencil sharpener? It just couldn't stay sharp together.