Why did the man break up with the guitar? It was too string-along-y.

Why did the man break up with the car? It drove him crazy.

Why did the woman break up with the bicycle? It was a real cycle-path.

Why did the man break up with the hiking boots? They just couldn't walk in the same direction.

Why did the man break up with the lemon? It was too sour.

Why did the woman break up with the vegetable? It was too corny.

Why did the woman break up with the train? It was always choo-choo-choosing to leave.

Why did the woman break up with the cloud? It never rain-ed love on her.

Why did the man break up with the tree? It wouldn't leaf him alone.

Why did the woman break up with math? It just didn't add up.

Why did the woman break up with the flashlight? It kept shining a light on their issues.

Why did the man break up with the calculator? It couldn't find the right equation for love.

Why did the woman break up with the banana? It kept peeling away from her affection.

Why did the woman break up with the cherry? It wouldn't pit anyone else first.

Why did the woman break up with the window? It couldn't see eye-to-eye with her.

Why did the man break up with the baseball? It was a real catcher.

Why did the woman break up with the TV? It was always channeling someone else.

Why did the man break up with his scissors? They were too cutting.

Why did the woman break up with the grape? It never asked her 'raisin' she was upset.

Why did the woman break up with the light bulb? It wasn't very bright.

Why do melons have big weddings? Because they cantaloupe.