What's a pirate's favorite Bible verse? Arrr-mageddon is coming!

What did the grape say at the church service? Let us pray!

Why did the ghost become a devout Catholic? He heard they had good boo-tiques!

What do you call a deer with a halo? A holy cow!

What did the Bible say to the unread book? Come follow me!

Why do astronauts believe in God? They need someone to have space talks with!

How do you keep a lemon in line with your faith? Citrus-pect!

Why did the ghost become a monk? He wanted to be a spirit-ual leader!

What do you call a nun in a canoe? A sister in tide!

Why don't cows believe in God? They're atheists-moo!

Why did the pastor open a bakery? To provide some spiritual dough!

Why did the pharaoh build the first pyramid? To get to some higher power!

What do you call a knight who loves to pray? Sir Lancelot of Prayers!

Why don't aliens visit churches? They already have out-of-this-world experiences!

What do you call a nun with a law degree? A sister in law!

Why did Noah keep all the animals on the ark? He didn't want any predators in the congregation!

What do you call a group of singing angels? A heavenly chorus!

Why was the angel sent home early from choir practice? Too much harp playing!

What kind of tea do high priests drink? Prophe-tea!

Why was the math teacher in the confessional booth? To solve some sin functions!

Why couldn't the vampire get into heaven? He couldn't pass the garlic checkpoint!