Why did the thief convert to Christianity? He heard stealing was a sin.

How does the Pope make all his speeches? In holy paragraphs.

Why couldn't the bicycle find the church? It lost its way.

Why did the nun sit on the clock? She wanted to go back in time.

What do you call a bear with a bible? A pray-er bear.

How does a vampire enter his house? Through the bat flap.

Why do cows go to church? To hear the moosic.

What do you call a bear without ears? B.

Why are angels good at baseball? Because they have great catching skills.

Why did the thief rob the church bell? He wanted to make a quick chime.

What do you call a nun with a dog? Virgin Mobile.

Why don't some cows go to church? They already have a 'holy cow'.

Why don't some owls go to church? They already have a 'hoo'ly presence.

Why did the baker go to church? He kneaded some spiritual guidance.

What do you call the devil's brushes? Hell-ters.

Why don't ghosts go to church? They already have a spiritual presence.

How do football players pray before a game? They tackle their problems in prayer.

Why did the musician go to church? To hit the right notes with God.

Why was the computer praying? It had a lot of bytes to process.

What's a nun's favorite time of day? Prayer time.

Why did the singer join the church choir? She needed some hymn-spiration.