Did you hear about the guy who tried to juggle chainsaws? Let's just say he's all thumbs now.

Why did the gymnast bring a rope to the comedy club? In case he needed to tie up the crowd!

Two clowns decided to have a pie-eating contest. It was a custard-y battle.

I tried to do a backflip on a trampoline, but I ended up getting stuck in the springs. It was quite the bounce-back.

What did the watermelon say to the comedian? You crack me up!

I saw a banana peel on the ground and just had to slip on it. Classic comedy gold!

Have you heard about the guy who invented the knock-knock joke? He won the 'No-bell' prize!

I once tried to balance a ladder on a unicycle. Let's just say it was a rung idea.

I once tried to play hopscotch on a moving escalator. It was a step in the wrong direction!

I accidentally sat on my watch and broke it. I guess my time really is up!

What do you call a comedian who's also a magician? Abra-cadabra-dabra!

Why did the bubble wrap break up with the tape? It wasn't sticking around!

Why was the scarecrow promoted at work? Because he was outstanding in his field!

Why was the cheerleader always cold? Because she kept doing splits!

Why did the scarecrow become a successful surgeon? He was outstanding in his field!

How do you organize a hide and seek competition? Good players are really hard to find.

Why did the runner stop to eat during the race? He wanted to get a little fast food!

Why was the baby strawberry crying? Because his mom was in a jam!

How do ducks fly in a V formation? Because it's the easiest way to travel!

Every time I finish a workout, I feel like a million bucks. Sadly, that doesn't translate to my bank account.

I tried to be a comedian, but the audience didn't laugh. Now I'm just a stand-up guy instead.