Why did the salad go to the art exhibit? It heard there would be dressing!

I tried to become a tailor, but I couldn't find the right fit!

Why did the bowling pins stop working together? They had a split!

I tried to take up fencing, but couldn't find a point to it!

I tried to touch the ceiling but I just ended up hitting rock bottom!

My cat is a great comedian... it always lands on its feet!

I accidentally walked into a glass door and now I see right through myself!

I tried to walk on water, but I got cold feet!

I accidentally swallowed a string and now I feel tied up in knots!

My cat was just sick on the art class floor—I've told her not to eat paintbrushes!

My pet rock broke its leg so I had to take it to the quarry!

Why did the surgeon break up with the scalpel? It just couldn't make the cut!

Why did the pirate break up with the treasure map? X didn't mark the spot!

Why did the tennis player break up with the tennis ball? It just wasn't a good match!

Why did the race car driver break up with the track? It was a rocky road!

Why did the robot break up with the computer? It needed to reboot its love life!

Why did the sailor break up with the sea? It was just too salty!

Why did the surfer break up with the wave? It was a wipeout!

Why did the magician break up with the hat? It kept pulling rabbits out of relationships!

Why did the detective break up with the suspect? They were hiding too many secrets!

Why did the baker break up with the oven? It just got too heated!