Why did the germ go to the gym? To work on its fitness!

Why don't punchlines ever get along? They always take things too literally!

Why did the candle stop melting? It couldn't handle the heat!

How did the frog die? It croaked!

Why do bananas sleep at night? They find it very a-peel-ing!

Why did the snowman go to the doctor? He had a meltdown!

What do you call a paper airplane that doesn't fly? Stationary!

Why was the belt the best employee? It always kept things together!

What did the big flower say to the little flower? Don't be a bloomin' idiot!

Why was the hairbrush running late? It got caught up in traffic!

Why did the toilet paper bring a pencil to the bathroom? It needed to take notes!

Why did the gum cross the road? To stick to the chicken's foot!

Why was the scarecrow always promoted? Because he was outstanding in his field.

What did one beach say to the other beach? Nothing, they just waved!

Why did the nose not want to join the band? It didn't want to blow its own horn!

Why did the germ feel lonely? It was feeling bacterial!

Why was the belt sad? It felt waist-ed!

Why was the math book constipated? It couldn't work out its problems!

Why did the clock in the bathroom always get stopped? It had to go number two!

Why was the basketball player a terrible comedian? His jokes were all dribble!

Why did the germ go to the party? It wanted to spread the word!