Why did the blonde bring a toaster to the bar? She wanted to 'heat up' the night.

How did the blonde break her leg in the bathtub? She slipped on her IQ.

Why did the blonde bring a stapler to the bar? She heard it was a 'binding' experience.

What do you call a blonde with an iPad? A data plan.

How did the blonde die while drinking coffee? The steamroller ran her over.

Why did the blonde bring a calendar to the beach? She wanted to 'seas' the day.

What do you call a blonde with a forklift? A lifting enthusiast.

Why did the blonde bring a lamp to the bar? She wanted to light up the night.

How did the blonde break her arm trying to catch a butterfly? She missed the 'net' result.

What do you call a blonde with a pet dog? A hair stylist.

Why did the blonde bring a thermometer to the bar? She wanted to check the 'temperature' of the crowd.

How did the blonde break her finger at the museum? She called an exhibit 'pointless'.

Why did the blonde bring a parachute to the bar? She thought the drinks were sky-high.

What do you call a blonde with a chainsaw? Tree surgeon.

Why did the blonde bring a pencil to the bar? She thought it was a 'write-off'.

What do you call a blonde with a camera? Selfie-centered.

How can you tell when a blonde is cheating at poker? She's playing 'dumb' cards.

What do you call a blonde in a bakery? A loaf lover.

Why did the blonde bring a shovel to the bar? She heard they had an 'Earth Quake' cocktail.

How did the blonde break her wrist using a vending machine? She tried to get a 'hand'out.

What do you call a blonde with a chainsaw? A carpenter's nightmare.