What do you call a politician who sleeps all day? A nap-oleonic leader!

Why did the politician bring a broom to the debate? To sweep the competition!

How do politicians greet each other? With campaign waves!

Why did the politician plant a tree? To branch out his policies!

What do you call a politician who breaks up fights? A peacekeeper!

Why did the politician bring a spoon to the protest? To stir things up!

How do politicians say goodbye? They wave, tax!

Why did the politician become a gardener? He wanted to root out corruption!

What do you call a politician who's always cold? A chill-iberate!

What do you call a politician who's also a magician? A sleight of legislator!

How do politicians communicate with aliens? They hold a congressional hearing!

Why did the politician go to the beach? He heard there was a lot of shore votes!

What's a politician's favorite snack? Lobby popcorn!

Why did the politician break up with his calendar? Because he couldn't commit to any dates!

Why did the politician switch to decaf? He was getting too jittery from all the scandals!

What do you call a politician who knows how to surf? A wave rider!

How does a politician get in shape for an election? By running around the issues!

Why did the politician become a chef? He heard the best way to win votes is through the stomach!

What did the politician say to the palm tree? You've got my vote!

How do politicians say goodbye? They wave and promise to do it again in four years.

Why did the politician break up with his calendar? He felt like it was trying to control his schedule.