What do you call a sleeping politician? A nap-olean!

Why do politicians make terrible comedians? They always seem to have an agenda.

How do politicians stay cool during debates? They find the nearest fan to blow hot air.

Why did the politician bring a scarf to the debate? To cover up any slip-ups!

What do you get when you cross a politician and a cat? A liar in wait!

Why did the politician go to the baseball game? To catch a grand slam in the polls!

What did the politician say to the baker? Can you whip up some votes for me?

How do politicians keep their hair perfect? They use a lot of campaign hairspray!

Why did the politician join the choir? He heard they had a lot of swing voters!

Why did the politician go to therapy? To work on his inability to commit.

What do you call a politician with no sense of direction? Lost in the polls.

Why did the politician go to the doctor? To get a check-up on his spin.

What do politicians and toddlers have in common? They both throw tantrums when they don't get their way.

What's a politician's favorite season? Election season, because it's all about the spin.

Why did the politician go to the art gallery? To brush up on his ability to paint a picture for the voters.

What do you call a politician in a suit? Dressed for success (or at least for the photo op).

Why did the politician join the cooking competition? To show off his talent for flipping positions.

What do you get when you cross a politician with a comedian? A joke that nobody finds funny but themselves.

Why did the politician go to the doctor? He was feeling a little too bipartisan.

What do you call a politician who's good at math? Calculated.

Why was the political speech wet? Because it was full of leaky promises.