Why did the politician bring a calculator to the rally? To always have the upper hand!

How do politicians communicate in the dark? With a bi-partisan flashlight!

Why did the politician switch to decaf? He didn't want to filibluster!

What's a politician's favorite dessert? Campaign pie!

How does a politician like his coffee? With a latte of perks!

What do you call a politician who cooks? A legislator!

Why did the politician always carry a map? To navigate through tough decisions!

What do you call a politician who can juggle? A multi-tasking representative!

Why did the politician bring a flashlight to the rally? To shed light on the issues!

How do politicians stay healthy? They exercise their right to vote!

What did one politician say to the other about the new law? 'It's legislation to me!'

Why did the politician get a pet fish? To keep things in line at the Capitol tank!

Why did the politician go to the doctor? To get a policy check-up!

What do you call a politician who practices yoga? A flex-ible leader!

Why did the politician sit on the clock during the meeting? To be the face of the party!

How do politicians handle a busy schedule? They filibust a move!

What do you call a politician who tells jokes? A pun-dit!

Why did the politician go to the comedy club? To see what real transparency looks like.

What do you call a politician at a comic book convention? A super PAC-man enthusiast.

Why was the politician always the last to leave the office? To make sure the spotlight was all theirs.

Why did the politician join the choir? To practice their spin on harmony.