I'm reading a book on helium; it's really uplifting.

I'm friends with a tree; it always branches out to me.

I used to be a shoe salesman, but I didn't toe the line.

Why did the scarecrow become a lawyer? It had great straw-gies.

I'm friends with a pun; it always plays a good trick.

Why do cows make great writers? They have outstanding moos.

Why did the math book look glum? It was full of problems.

I'm friends with a volcano; it knows how to erupt in laughter.

I tried to tell a joke about wheat, but it wasn't grainy.

Why did the chicken join a band? It had perfect pitch.

I'm friends with a cloud; it's always on cloud nine.

Why are math books so sad? They have too many problems.

Why did the math book sleep during class? It was overworked.

I thought about becoming a baker, but it wasn't the yeast of my worries.

I'm friends with a pond; it always makes a splash.

Why did the calendar get in trouble? It needed to turn over a new leaf.

I told a joke about a chair, but it was just a sit-down comedy.

Why did the scarecrow become a musician? It had outstanding rhythm.

Why do skeletons go to the barbecues? For spare ribs.

I'm friends with a banana; it always peels back the layers.

I used to be a carpenter, but I couldn't build a joke.