I used to be a physicist, but I couldn't quantum leap.

I told my kids to eat vegetables, but it didn't produce any results.

Why did the math book go to the party? It heard there would be Pi.

I used to be a shoe repairman, but I couldn't heel.

I told my wife she should swim laps to stay in shape. She dove right in.

I told my wife she should run marathons to stay in shape. That would be a step in the right direction.

I used to be a swimmer, but I couldn't make waves.

I told my wife she should do pull-ups to stay in shape. She rose to the occasion.

I used to be a lawyer, but I couldn't case the joint.

I told a joke about umbrellas, but it didn't make a splash.

I used to be a casino dealer, but I couldn't deal with the cards.

I told my wife she should jog to stay in shape. She ran with the idea.

I told my computer I needed more space, but it couldn't help me.

I used to be a waiter, but I couldn't handle the tray-c.

I told my wife she should do push-ups to stay in shape. She lifted to the challenge.

I told my dog to sit, but it went over his head.

I told my wife she should do chin-ups to stay in shape. It's a jaw-dropping idea.

I told a joke about the sky, but it flew over their heads.

I used to be a writer, but I couldn't spell it out.

Why did the athlete go to jail? It was a sprint to the finish.

I told my wife she should do yoga to stay in shape. That would be a flexible choice.