Why did the man propose to the ocean? Because it had waves that stole his heart.

Why don't eggs propose to each other? They would rather shell-ebrate being single.

Why did the couple go to therapy at the beach? They needed to work on their sandy relationship.

Relationships are like farting in an elevator. If you force it, it's probably going to be crap.

My girlfriend told me she wanted to see other people. I said 'Don't worry, I already see other people... they're called my friends.'

Why did the man propose to his girlfriend on a clock? Because he wanted to spend his time with her.

Relationships are like a walk in the park. Jurassic Park.

My boyfriend said he wanted to be my everything. So now I call him 'Nothing' when we fight.

Why did the man break up with his calendar? Because he dated too many days.

I asked my wife if I was the man of her dreams. She said 'If I had dreams about you, I'd be sleeping.'

Relationships are like a bank account. You put in effort, withdraw love, and hope it all adds up in the end.

Why did the woman bring a ladder to her date? She heard he was falling for her.

Why did the man sleep under the car? Because he wanted to get up oily in the morning!

Why did the man break up with the calendar? Because his days were numbered.

I would tell you a joke about my relationship, but it needs some time to set up.

My girlfriend said she wanted to live in a castle. So I got us front row tickets to a medieval reenactment.

I told my husband I'd make him a belt made out of watches, but it would be a waist of time.

My boyfriend said he wanted to be more spontaneous. So I got him a calendar with all the dates circled.

Why did the man put his girlfriend in a blender? Because he heard she was a cut above the rest.

I asked my wife if she ever fantasizes about me, she said yes. And I was so happy until she told me it was the one where I get hit by a bus.

Why did the chef break up with the butcher? It was a meaty issue.