Why did the vegetable become a monk? It wanted to find inner peas.

Why did the grape stop attending church? It lost its raisin to go.

Why did the chicken join the church choir? It had a strong egg-o voice.

Why did the cross-eyed teacher lose her job? She couldn't control her pupils!

Why was the musician kicked out of the church choir? He kept hitting the wrong note.

Why did the cookie go to confession? Because it was feeling crumbly.

Why did the Buddhist refuse a dinner invitation? He wanted to avoid attachment to food.

What do you get when you cross a nun and a boxer? A punchline.

Why did the religious football team always win? They had great Hail Mary passes.

Why did the pastor go to the gym? To work on his preacher curls.

Why did the chicken go to church? To say his prayers.

What do you call a holy man who is also a great poker player? A cardin-all.

Why did the ghost go to church? To exorcise his demons.

What do you call a group of chess players at a religious gathering? Check-mates.

Why did Noah only bring 14 animals on the ark? Because he couldn't find a mate for the unicorns.

What did the preacher say to the credit card? 'I do not accept that kind of debt.'

Why did the scarecrow become a monk? He was outstanding in his field.

Did you hear about the thief who broke into the church and stole the box of donations? He took the money and ran, but left the guilt behind.

Why did the turkey join the church choir? It had a great gobble voice.

Why did the Buddhist refuse Novocain when he had a toothache? He wanted to transcend dental medication.

Did you hear about the fight that broke out at the church picnic? It was a food fight between the pasta and the antipasto.